MomCraze Tales Day 5: Idiot Box

Deanna CrawfordBeing a Parent, Canada, MomCraze0 Comments


Day 5 of 7 Alone with 3 Kids

Putting the girls to bed last night at a later time only half worked. Hazel was at my bedside by 5:30am…again… But I was ready for her… I had a Sippy cup prepped from the night before… I’m starting to catch on….

She drank while I nursed Charlie, then I turned around to eagerly awaiting fingers. Hazel now has full booby access. She is now free to coddle, cuddle, hold one until it starts to leak, and then move to the next one. The great part about this is that there were no tantrums, no screaming and within minutes we were all sleeping soundly! Charlie stirs for more booby 2 hours later (he still nurses every 2 hours… which is its own kind of hell and I’ll talk about another time).

When he goes back to sleep, Hazel tells me she has peed the bed… I was at first confused until I felt the giant wet spot! Maybe I shouldn’t have given her the Sippy cup when her diaper was full. Hazel drinks a lot and fast. Her diaper just couldn’t take any more of her massive pees. With Charlie and Nora still sleeping I figure it’s a good time to shower… It’s been some time for me and I’m starting to itch (gross I know but I do have 3 kids 2 and under and have been alone since Tuesday morning). Hazel smells like pee so why not?

I swear Nora can read minds because I haven’t even said bath and she woke up asking for one. So in the shower we go. I put the plug in for the girls so they can play and I continue to wash myself… I look at the girls swimming around in the bath and realize that they are playing in my gross dirty water. Then I see Hazel drinking it….. Yep… shower time is over. Nora wasn’t very happy to have it cut short but oh well, I’m the boss…. right?

I get them dressed; there is only one meltdown from Nora because I won’t let her put my phone in her diaper. Toddlers are so weird…

Charlie is awake by then and we all go downstairs…. We have breakfast while watching Monster Inc. I know watching TV while you eat is a big no-no but sometimes we just have to survive the best way we can. If that means my kids watch the idiot box while they eat then, damn it I don’t care!

After breakfast they play for a bit, it’s raining and crappy so it’s an inside day (yay). I put on another movie so I can use the washroom and not have them kill each other in my absence. When I get back Hazel wants booby… I’m trying to not to give it to her all the time so I say no… She says “jut me hand mama” and is trying to put her hand down my shirt. This little girl is seriously strong. But I win, eventually.

Now Charlie hasn’t had a poop in 8 or so days and I was starting to get worried so yesterday and today I gave him some pureed pears. Well am I super lucky that my Mother in law came for a visit because the pears worked… holy crap did it work! Too well… He has never had a blowout as big as this… it was all the way up in his armpit!  Like I said thank god I wasn’t alone because the only way to get him clean was a bath…

I was able to get the girls and Charlie down for a much needed nap… I could have cleaned or done laundry… nope… I needed to sleep…. 1.5 hours later the call of “mama poopy bum” came and took me out of my blissful dream where I was childless and in Vegas. The nap was nice…

Off we go downstairs and have a quiet snack and the girls played for a while. Until they were replaced by tiny angry bullies and the fighting started… I was determined to have a few hours with no TV. We played, we coloured, but the moment I would leave the room they would fight about something… I am not going to lie but after 2 hours I am so tired and really cranky that I just can’t take the screaming and the not listening and the fighting and hitting that I really lose my cool. I may have said the “f” word a few times to only hear it repeated back to me. That does something for the mom guilt. I am so done doing this alone… I know it’s only 2 more days but right now that seems forever! I’m not saying this to get any pats on the back, I bow down humbly to the single parents out there… this shit is hard!

Today may have been the toughest day by far. My girls did not listen to one word I said. My house is a disaster and I am going to bed at 8:30….

There was a win…. another day with no biting!

In case you missed it, catch up on Day 1, Day 2, Day 3, Day 4 yeeeah!

About the Writer

Deanna Crawford is a stay-at-home mom of 2.5-year-old twin girls and a 6-month old boy living in New Glasgow, Nova Scotia, Canada. She started to write her thoughts as a way of keeping sane and hopes her contribution makes other mothers laugh and feel a sense of solidarity. Originally from Vancouver, Deanna spent her pre-child years singing in bands, staying up late and staying in bed until at least 10am. Deanna loves to laugh, drink wine with friends and really loves the idea of sewing – though she has yet to try it. Follow Deanna on Twitter and Facebook!